I received this in an email, it is supposedly a post that was on Craigslist (although I have not taken the time to verify it's authenticity, I just thought it was funny so I thought I'd share).
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To the woman that crapped in my car. (NE Portland)
We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.
I thought we had chemistry sitting at McMenamins sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Terminator Stout. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.
At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don't feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said "First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me" was meant to be funny, not offensive.
I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle's lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don't think anyone wins 100% of the time. That's why they call it "gambling". I'm the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better...like when you're not sitting on a heated leather seat...
What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.
I await your call,
Tad
P.S. - If you shat yourself on purpose to end the evening early. Touché.
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This guy has got to get an award for most understanding or something. If Wade shat himself on our 1st date I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be willing to give him a 2nd. Is that harsh?
17 comments:
That's what he gets for being named, 'Tad.'
If it's not for real, that's too bad. Tad seems like he's a keeper!
Wow.
I'm pretty sure I couldn't look past that.
There would be NO second date.
that is so great!! one time this dude that i liked puked all over my bedroom. we never went out again. i think i'd feel the same way about poop.
and cajun tots sound delicious.
Wow. Awesome. A shart on the first date. Classic.
By the way, Tad needs to learn that there's no lactose in cheese.
So how come this guy doesn't have her #? She probably changed it she was so embarrassed
So how come this guy doesn't have her #? She probably changed it she was so embarrassed
Wait, shitting your pants on the first date is a bad thing? Oh.
Oh my god. Why is pooping only in a toilet such a difficult thing for some people? No second date for sure.
I... uh... I...
wowza.
Ooooh a poop and run.
deadly.
omG that's hysterical!!!!!
hahhaaa.... wow....
I like the word "shat" I shall say shat for everything now!
Wow, funniest thing I've seen in a long time.
And yep, there wouldn't be a second date had that happened to me. Tad sounds pretty desperate lol.
i find some of the most comical writings on craigslist. who needs sitcoms?
Oh em gee. Craigslist is always amazing.
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